Life of the Lintee Bean

Unfortunately, my ability to understand my cleaning lady has no relation to the importance of the information she is trying to convey. For example, I struggled to understand that I could reschedule my cleaning or that I forgot to leave her a check once. However, I understood perfectly that her mother is coming from Poland to visit and it will be the first time she’s seen her in ten years.

She gave me a lovely box of chocolates and a card.

Holiday card from my cleaning lady – inside

Holiday card from my cleaning lady – outside

I am going to guess this says something wishing me a happy holiday and new year… or something along those lines. I have no idea.

Last year I got a similar card. I took it to work. I asked a Polish coworker about it. The conversation went something like:

Me: Can you read this? Do you understand what it says?
Coworker (examines card carefully): Yes

Me: Um… can you read it TO ME?
Coworker: Blah-blah-blah in Polish

Me: Um… okay. Can you translate it for me? I mean, can you tell me what it says in English?
Coworker (thinks): Blah-blah birthday of baby Jesus… happiness in year ahead….

Me: Great! Thank you! I basically just wanted to know if it said “I hate you, I hate cleaning for you, you are an evil witch and I hope you rot.”
Coworker: Um… no… it does not say that.

Coworker does not appreciate my twisted sense of humor. That’s okay, many people don’t. I understand this.