Previously, on “Life of the Lintee Bean”:
When we left our heroine.. okay, me… we were on day 15 of our 20 day push-up duel against the big dude from Texas… and the score was 945 to 831. Whatever shall happen? Will our heroine’s arms fall off?
January 27: Day 16 of the duel. Lintee manages five sets of 12 (60) push-ups. I’ve now done 1,005 push-ups. Can you believe I’ve done over a THOUSAND push-ups? I cannot!
January 28: Duel day 17. SEVEN sets of 12, for a total of 84 push-ups. The score is now 1,089 to 1,093.
January 29: Duel day 18. TWELVE sets of 12, for a total of 144 push-ups!!! BOOYAH! You may wonder how I managed this. The answer… stupidity. I usually do a single set of 12 between another exercise when I do them at the gym. This time it was reverse crunches, but for some reason, I was doing THREE sets of 12 push-ups between sets of reverse crunches. By the third “round” I was struggling and thinking “why the heck is this so HARD today?” Um… it’s so hard because you’re doing a lot more, dummy! But… stupidity for the WIN! The score is now 1,233 to 1,194. I am in the lead! Oh my gosh, I am in the lead! It is a pitiful lead, but it is a lead!
January 30: It’d day 19 of the duel… must give it EVERYTHING I’VE GOT! I manage twelve sets of 10, three sets at a time over the course of the very long movie of Dark Knight Rising, for a total of 120 push-ups. I have 1,353 push-ups.
January 31: This is it! The 20th and FINAL day – I MUST DO THIS. Unfortunately, it is crazy busy at work… and, to top it off, I have to go to the grocery store after work and get treats to take in the next day. I do 12 push-ups before I leave work. I get home and hit the floor. I’m sore… and tired… and I know the duel can end any minute. (It officially ends at midnight… but I forget WHAT TIME ZONE.) So, I’m entering my sets as I do them. I manage five more sets of 12…. my score so far is 1,425.
I sit down and check the duel score… my nemesis has not logged his yet. I wait. He comes online, logs… and I see his score stands at 1,502. I’m behind by 77. Wait, I think I’ve got 77 in me… maybe I can do this, though time IS of the essence. I hit the floor again.
I squeeze out another three sets of 12. I’m still behind by 41 push-ups, but I have to stop for a breather.
He logs another 25.
I hit the floor. I’m going to go down fighting… or pushing… or upping. I manage another 12. The score is 1,473 to 1,527. My arms hurt. I’m tired. It’s apparently not ending at midnight Eastern Standard Time.
He does another 24.
Okay, I can’t do this. I officially concede. I have noodles for arms. However, I am going to go for a total of 1,500 push-ups. Because. I am. So I manage another set of 12 and a set of 15. I’m done… in more ways than one.
So… finally tally for my final day… 147 push-ups. My total push-ups over 20 days (January 12 through 31) – 1,500 push-ups. Final score of the duel: 1,500 to 1,551.
I lose.
But… I win! I did 1,500 push-ups! I would NEVER have believed I could do 1,500 push-ups! Go me! Yay me!
and now… answers to frequently asked questions:
1) No – these were not kneeling or “girly” push-ups. Those do not count in Fitocracy duels. These were on-the-toes hands-and-toes-on-the-floor push-ups.
2) No, I didn’t do 1,500 push-ups at once, in one set. I did them over the course of 20 days. (Oh my gosh, are you INSANE! Look at me, does it look like I could do 1,500 push-ups in one set?)
3) No, I’m not making this up. There was really an “official” duel on Fitocracy.
Oh yeah… and also… remember I made a “yarn and stuffing” version of my personal trainer? Well, then I had to make a “yarn and stuffing” version of me. Because. I did. I also figured out how to add hair to my trainer.

My personal trainer (left) and me (right)
So when do I get a yarn and stuffing midnightyell? 😀
Ooh… now THERE’S an idea!
[…] “novel”, people started asking about them – including the guy I’d “dueled” in the past. He challenged me to a second duel, and wanted a doll if he won. He […]