Life of the Lintee Bean

Many people participate in “fantasy sports”.  I’ve overheard coworkers discussing their fantasy teams, or caught them on the Internet making last-minute trades, cuts, or lineup changes. They pick their dream team and win or lose “games” with other players based on how well their players do in “real life”.

Last year I played fantasy hockey through the Chicago Blackhawks’ website.  For each game, you pick some Blackhawks players, subject to a salary cap.  The person with the most points each month, season, etc., can win a jersey or other  merchandise.  I’ve never won anything, though I’ve bragged when I made the first page (top 50 scores) of the “leaderboard” (scores of all 1,500 plus participants).  Once I was even the top scorer.

This year I wanted to play in a “real” fantasy league, where you’re not limited to a single team.  I found a website with free fantasy hockey.  I created a team (the Lintee Bean Puckers) and waited to be assigned to a league.  I was still waiting weeks into the season.  Maybe I did something wrong.

I found another site. This site had free fantasy hockey, football, basketball, baseball, and “celebrity”. I have no idea what a “celebrity” fantasy league is about.  I’m curious, sometime I’ll have to check it out.

I created my team (the Lintee Bean Puckers) – then realized I’d created a FOOTBALL team.  That was NOT my intent.  I tried again, and created my fantasy hockey team.  I was going to delete my football team, then decided I’d use it for “practice”.  I did rename my football team the Lintee Bean Punters, which made a little more sense since there’s no pucks in football (that I know of).

Our football draft was that Tuesday.  I don’t know much about football.  I picked a good-looking quarterback first.  Later I found they don’t give points for good looks, or cool mascots, or even great uniforms. I should have reviewed the scoring rules before the draft.

I also drafted a few players whose names I thought I recognized.  It wasn’t until I was bragging about drafting Moss and Jackson and someone asked “which one?” that I discovered I need to pay attention to FIRST as well as last names.  I also need to look at which teams they’re on, and what position they play.  It’s complicated!

I was embarrassed at how poorly my football team did the first week.  It’s just a game, but my performance was pathetic.  I solicited help from my friend, Kirk, and make a lot of changes.

Our hockey league wasn’t full yet the first week, so the draft was postponed to the following Monday.  I was relatively pleased with my draft choices – until the next day when I suffered a huge case of drafter’s remorse.  I made a lot of cuts and adds.

So, how are things going?  I’m proud to report it was a good week for my Blackhawks fantasy team, the Lintee Bean Puckers, and the Lintee Bean Punters.

I was 17th out of 1,166 in the Blackhawks fantasy game Sunday.

The Lintee Bean Puckers won their NHL “game” 78.3 to 66 (tallying their points Monday through Sunday).

The fantasy football results aren’t final as of this writing.  However, the Lintee Bean Punters currently lead the league this week with 131.3 points. They’ve most certainly won their “game” as our opponent had only 47.6 points.  (He obviously isn’t paying attention as he played a running back with a bye.)  Well, maybe Kirk is responsible for our football victory, but I’m bragging just the same.

Submitted for publication in the Greeley Citizen

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