Unfortunately, I’ve been having trouble with my Internet connection – AGAIN. I’ve contacted my new 4G provider, and their customer service representatives have been exceedingly polite and helpful – but unable to resolve the issue. They suspected the tower needed servicing, and had it scheduled for end of August.
Sadly, the problem was getting worse, not better. I finally broke down and checked into my other option – cable Internet. Now, don’t get me wrong, I LOVE the idea of cable Internet, phone and TV. Cable Internet is super fast and cable TV obviously vastly expands your viewing options. There’s just one issue with cable – Greeley Center Cable doesn’t service Chicago. I have ONE provider option – the EVIL HORRIBLE MONOPOLY cable company of Chicago.
I check out their super confusing website for pricing. They list four or five prices for every single product (TV, Internet, and phone). They have packages – bundle offers – for two or three services as well. The prices listed aren’t REALLY the prices – they are promotional offers, which are good for six, maybe twelve months – at which point the prices change to something higher (which is in tiny font hidden deep in the website).
Their Internet promotion includes a “free modem”. When I actually talk to a representative, they ask if I need a modem (noting that my existing modem probably does not work with their service) – and say that I can lease the modem for $5 a month, or purchase one for $180. How is it that a “free” modem costs $5 a month? Their definition of “free” must differ from mine and Webster’s.
For television, I can get a “starter” package… or add free high-definition (HD) TV for an additional $20 a month. Again, I fail to understand how they define “free”.
After much scouring of their main website and other affiliate sites, I finally find an offer for both Internet and phone for $40 a month plus “no one-time fees”. The $40 goes up to $85 after six months. (So, it’s not really $40, obviously.) The modem costs another $5. The representative also informs me that there will be an installation fee of $50 for the Internet, $40 for the phone, and a $10 activation fee. Excuse me? It said “no one-time fees”. She agrees, but says I still have to pay for installation and activation. Again, their understanding of “no one-time fees” must differ from mine. I try to reason with the representative – but she only offers that I can go to one of their offices and discuss it there. She KNOWS I won’t do that – who wants to go to their office and stand in line for ages only to get some curt company representative that won’t help them? So, I set up an installation appointment with dread.
After all this, I call my 4G provider to cancel, and the customer service representative says he’s showing I have a good connection – and a quick speed test does show it’s better than it has been. So I canceled my installation appointment with the evil cable company. While I’m not hoping for the best, I’m hoping for tolerable service.
Submitted for publication in The Greeley Citizen.
